Hi there! Long time no see everyone. As you may (or may not) have noticed, I haven’t blogged in over a week. While that might seem like a measly amount of time in retrospect, it has felt like an eternity since I have sat down and just wrote. Wrote my thoughts. Wrote advice. Wrote out my struggles. Wrote anything.
So, hi. I am happy to see you guys again!
Lately, I have been feeling kind of like this-
I love Ralph from The Simpsons. He makes me smile!
In all seriousness, the real reason why I haven’t been writing is that I have been in a bit of a rut. I’m not sure if the rut is depression seeping in or just simply a few “blah” days. Lately, I get home from work and I just don’t want to do anything. It isn’t laziness by any means. I just don’t have the will to do things I used to love doing- like blogging.
I abhor that I don’t have the will to blog because I adore it. I really truly do. I get to connect with so many wonderful people (like you!), write, and discover new things about myself. Not blogging has been hard and I think it has just worsened my mood. Perhaps it is depression.
Depression wants to isolate you. It eats at you whether you are alone or with people, but it is much easier to focus on it when you are isolated. Sometimes it really does feel like I am Elsa from Frozen.
Not only has my depression increased, but my body image has plummeted. It makes me feel worthless and disgusting. I have to remind myself that those are not true. I am have air in my lungs and am a child of God. Why should I then feel worthless? Those awful thoughts that creep into my head are irrational.
That is why I am here right now. I’m fighting the demons in my head one written word at a time. The more I write right now, I feel just a tiny bit better.
So tell me…
- Have you been in a rut?
- Have you ever seen The Simpsons?
- What have you been up to? I missed you all!
I will see you all really soon with a real post!
Stay in Touch!